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26 July 2030 @ 08:17 pm

Made by shouei

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11 February 2030 @ 07:13 pm
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I am not a nice person.

It seems as if I have to put it out there, lay it all on the table, before silly little naysayers will actually get it. Hell, I'm can nasty, petty bitch with a very quick temper. So please, save your breath with all the "that's her typically 'nice' behavior" and other pointless endeavors, because oh man, I am not nice.

And I sure as hell am proud of it.

So go, take it out there, won't you? I will proudly say that I am not a nice person. I can be bitchy, I can be catty. I get angry. I vent frustrations. And then I forget. But here's the thing - what I say behind your back, I will say to your face first, if you're a friend. If you're not a friend? Trust me, you'll know. Normally, I wouldn't bother with pointless things like this, but oh well, since I'm on a roll, right?

So go ahead and say whatever you want, smear however much you like - I've learned long ago to not bother. Hey, there are only 24 hours in a day, I spend eight of it asleep, twelve of it at work. The rest goes to friends; please don't flatter your little egos by thinking that I would actually lose sleep/precious friendtime over people who don't have enough balls to call me a shitty bitch to my face. Because, come on, seriously?

You don't pay me. I'm actually far from obliged to pay close attention to wank, or to jump through hoops to seek your approval. Though, speaking of friends, yes, of course I treat friends a lot better than anyone else. I think it'd particularly suck if I treated everyone else better than I treat my friends. To be clear and fair - I am a generally civil person unless you push my buttons. And yes, if I don't give you the time of the day, you stand 100 percent chance of being a complete moron. Why would I want to waste effort being nice to someone I don't like?

I'm affectionate, I'm over the top, I'm so deeply emotional it's not funny at times, but I regret nothing. I reserve the right to be a bitch to the people I dislike, to favor the people I like, to take sides and not take sides, because, you see, this is my life here, so please don't remain under the impression that I'll fall in obediently because you had something OMG *~nasty~* to say. Please, do go ahead and say what you like - I reserve the same right to do and say whatever I like. I can tell you frankly that I am a person. I will screw up, and already have, for a lot of things, but at least I have enough balls to admit it and apologize. Did I regret them? Oh, hell no.

Friendships gone sour? Good bye - it's sad, but we all move on, and I don't spend my nights awake shedding tears over it.

Those I count among my friends? I love and care very much for. Love doesn't mean you NEVER get angry at them, or frustrated. The others? We'll see. It's really just that simple. Don't get it? It's all right. You will, eventually.

And there is another little thing. If you want to talk to me? Then talk to me. I only have a limited time online, and lots of things to do with lots of different people - it's not going to kill you to ping me from time to time if you need me or if you need to talk. It's not an attitude, it's common sense.

I'm not going to tell any naysayer to gtfo, or shut up, because man, you can really say whatever you want to, wherever you want to, but I've bowed out of the backstabbing scene a long, long time ago. And I don't even care enough for RPS wank to want to add to it as anon or otherwise. Here's a groundbreaking reason: I have much better things to do with my life, and hell, I'm not getting any younger. There are friends/people I like to actually lavish attention and love on, you know?

You - and I mean the 'you' that's actively looking for wank, or for something or other to be outraged/unpleasantly surprised about - don't matter enough for me to bother. So, try to get a rise out of me as best as you can. Make my day, show me how intently you want to make me miserable. Maaaaaaaaaybe this time I'll actually pay attention, who knows?

Me? I'll be over here, having more fun and enjoying myself in the life I'm living. ♥ And now that I've wasted sufficient time on this, I'm going back to mahjong with my brother and our friends.
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02 April 2010 @ 01:30 pm
/brushes dust off this journal

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04 November 2009 @ 10:29 pm

For what is a man? What has he got?
If not himself - Then he has naught.
To say the things he truly feels
And not the words of one who kneels.

Definitely never in the words of one who kneels. Not anymore, not now, not ever. I'm far too proud for that. And, I think, that's the way it should be. What have I said that I regretted?

I will tell you now.

Absolutely nothing.
i feel this: satisfiedsatisfied
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23 June 2009 @ 09:55 am
God LJ you fucking whore.

Thoughts on Amat wank. Condensed in bullet points because I'm cramping, and really. Nutshell, here I come.

- Mods do their job. Weed out a playercesting case. Mods screw up by putting IP logging. Many batfuck mistakes made by mod team, including foot in mouth comment by Inara mod. Because dude, seriously. Inara mod, take a few lessons in public relations. The way you handled it? Deeply uncool.
- Matter gets blown up way out of proportion. Stupidity on both the mods' and the players' part. Although admittedly I think that the mods weigh just that little bit more on the scale on that. But human error, everyone makes stupid mistakes, we move on.
- Mods actually do very well overall, considering some are inexperienced. I regret that I base my assessment on how professional the Poly mods are compared to Amat, but still, experience. No blaming there.
- Good job, mods.
- I'm sad the MGS cast left. I'm not sad the players did. They're a bunch of annoying whiners who bitch endlessly because baaaaaawwwwww - whatever it is that they're whining about now. I didn't bother to read the entire way.
- Lying is uncool, kids. Lying is especially uncool when you whine about being caught.
- I have nothing against playercesting. People do it. I do have a problem with IP logging. I am aware that this is a dead horse. Watch me beat this dead horse.
- On the other hand, I also have a massive problem with bitching about it when you're caught with your pants down
- People in Amat really can't keep secrets. It'd be stupid to not expect a leak when you're flouting the rules, because, dude.
- BB-mun is an immense douche. To which I see good riddance, the door's over there, and get the fuck out. No one needs your shitty attitude. Demanding confidential information from a mod is retarded, too. "Who ratted me out? Who ratted me oooout? BAAAAW I'M GOING TO RPS!" blah, blah, blah, shut up.
- I relate this sentiment to the MGS crew, actually.
- Again, good riddance to bad rubbish.
- I don't care if this gets out.
- I really do wish Azkedillia and Leoben would shut their yaps and be a lot less fucking annoying. Because really, nobody cares what they think. At least I don't.

In other related news;

- I hate my uterus.
- If you eat this up again, Elgay, we will have words.
- Edit just to say that if this cramping keeps going on, I will rip my uterus out and set it on fire.
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Ave Maria, piena di grazia,
Santa Maria, Madre di Dio,
prega per noi peccatori,
adesso e nell'ora della nostra morte.
In nomine patris, et filii
et spiritus sancti

A m e n

The day they came for Yamamoto Tsuyoshi, Yamamoto Takeshi was carrying out a mob hit in Rome, Italy.Collapse )
i feel this: calmcalm
i hear: Jay Chou - In the Name of the Father
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New profile is shiny and new and I blame jailbreak and realityfinale for their extreme faggotry and this new love for D1869.
i hear: The Spill Canvas - Connect the dots
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05 February 2009 @ 10:01 pm
For reborn_biz - Dino Cavallone's company. App to come later. Rough copy, will be improved on:

Fill these spaces up with days.Collapse )